Monday Post and I’ve got nothing, nada, zip, diddle to share! I spent long periods of time today observing colleagues looking for a facial tick or an unusual habit… Nothing – they have all decided to morph into the greatest height of sophistication. So, I could talk about the slow but steady progress I made through my email backlog… No? Not good enough for a blog post, you say….
How about the psychological trauma I caused one of my colleagues when we played the “What animal would you be game?”
Yes, let’s do that.
So anyone who has worked in an office (or god forbid you sometimes get this question at interviews) will have played some version of this game. It involves asking a question about “What would you be”. Doesn’t have to be an animal, I’ve been asked what car, brand, drink, decade… and the list goes on.
However, today in a lull in the office about 3pm someone started the “So if you were an animal what animal would you be?” conversation. Now, once this starts, you have to join in and listen politely to all your colleagues answers even though certain individuals seem to delight in their own perceived cleverness.
It went on for hours and we get – Tiger, Elephant, Cat, Monkey, Dog and for all the usual reasons. Then the last answer was…. “Dolphin”.
“I would like to be a Dolphin, because they are beautiful creatures and are always happy and smiling”
Oh really, play the animal game and choose Dolphin will you?
Now, you may not be aware of this but Dolphins are known to commit infanticide, murder and rape. Yup, flipper has an extremely dark side…. I might have dropped into the conversation at this point how shocked I was that my learned friend would choose such a violent creäture..
“Are you winding me up?” (She’s not the sharpest tool in the drawer so this was actually a fair question.) After checking (don’t you just love Google?) and then being terrified that “Big Brother” would catch her searching for Dolphin Porn; at five thirty on her departure she was still muttering about dark evil sea beasts.
On exit, I wandered past her desk and it was literally covered in Dolphin-ness. We had mini porcelain porpoises, photo frames and even a small crystal jumping action flipper, displayed in pride of place. I’m not sure why I’ve never noticed this predilection for the squeaky sea-mammals before but, do you think ooooppppsss, covers it?
- Dolphins blamed for mysterious deaths of seal pups in Orkney (scotsman.com)