Category Archives: GOT TIME?

THE LOST BLOG – A NEWBIE SAYS GOODBYE

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It’s been six and a half weeks since I started this little sojourn into blogging and I have met some great characters along the way. Diversity on WP is everywhere. The first time someone decides to Follow You. You want to explode into song. Me, you want to hear more of what little ol’ me has to say. Are you sure? Really? No, I’m not complaining but okay. You think it’s a fluke, an act of madness perhaps; they’ll un-follow you anyways shortly. You then get your second and your third and it’s like all your Christmases have come at once!

Then people start commenting. Not just “nice post check out my blog” – They say stuff that tells you that they have actually read what you’ve said, they’ve connected. They “GET” you!

Some people who comment, you get what they say too… You go and look at their blogs often, you spend time there. You build a little branch of understanding and friendship.

Then disaster!

You see today I went to check out someone’s Blog, they started a few months before me and we were newbies together.

They’re not there anymore. Disappeared, high tailed, vamoosed – GONE.

WP tells me that the Blog was deleted by the author. What? They left, without goodbye, without so much as a ”Ta Ta for now” or a “So long and thanks for all the fish?”. They were one of the top commenters on my blog and whilst we didn’t agree on everything, there was a synergy there; a companionship and sense of community. The fact that they were new too and got what it’s like when you’ve started – that thrill you get with every little bloggy milestone passed….

Daniela of the Lantern Press. I don’t know where you have gone or what made you leave but I wish you the best. I hope you come back one day even if it’s just to tell me you’ve set up on Blogger.

THE HOURGLASS

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“Old enough to know better and young enough to still not give a damn.” – Anon

This post is dedicated to Mags – You know who you are.

I am fast approaching a birthday that cannot be avoided and the number makes me nervous. I don’t consider myself old or “past it” but the fears are still there, hiding in the eaves at my lifes’ theatre. The realisation that my hourglass is a little less full than before is creeping stealthily upon me.

There are some wonderful things about getting old-er (see what I did there?). On one level, I have started to feel that I am growing into my body and I am far less concerned with how others perceive me. Gone are the days where I would stand in my bedroom in the morning paralysed with fear at the wardrobe, although black tie events do still hold this power – occasionally.

Nowadays, I speak out when I see something that’s not right, whether it is a complaint about customer service or just a general “stupid idea” at work. I try to do these things in the nicest way possible and it comes from a confidence that has grown into my skin with me. It must have been on sabbatical during my twenties.

The onset of being thirty-six (in four weeks’ time) has made me look at other things, important things, that I thought I had locked up in a tight little chest at the bottom of the ocean, never to see the light of day again.

Take the question of children; the time is coming where I will have to make a conscious choice. I have always thought that children are one of the greatest adventures you can have in your life. But If I don’t decide soon, it may no longer be a decision that is in my hands, the choice will have been made for me by my body.

The issue is further complicated by my husband who is a full two decades older than me and already has the most amazing daughter (she’s thirty-two and not allowed to have kids – EVER!). He reassures me all the time that if I decide that this is right, he will be fully behind me one hundred percent. This lacks the urgency for him – He’s been there and done that. I feel pressurised into choosing “against” for his sake - as children, whilst an adventure, also need you to make significant lifestyle and economic sacrifices.

Then there is my writing. Put off for more than twenty years whilst other dramas played out. I’m greatfull to have this wonderful gift back. I finally think that I’m ready. My former angst about writing wasn’t that I couldn’t do it, it was the divine hope that if I didn’t do it at all. I could always tell myself that I could have done it. – I could have been a contender….

Luckily the voices just won’t quit at the moment. The urge is strong.

As I look into “my view” this morning I notice that the sun is shining for the first time in months in the UK. The flowers he planted all look beautiful. Juicy fat strawberries; the last of the summers crop sit waiting for me to have a forage.

So, today I am going to go out and make some memories with the view-maker because sitting indoors writing whilst wonderful, isn’t living fully and I’d like to squeeze some more sand out of that hourglass.

Warning
by Jenny Joseph

WHEN I AM AN OLD WOMAN I SHALL WEAR PURPLE
With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we’ve no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people’s gardens
And learn to spit

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple

Comments as always, welcome.

MY BLOG NEEDS A CAREERS ADVISOR

grow up

A Swan, me? No Way!

I keep asking my blog what it wants to be when it grows up? – It has yet to give me a satisfactory answer. It all started you understand as a bit of an experiment, a marketing forage into the unknown world of the blog. That changed quite quickly into something more authentic and I can’t imagine ever using my little space in the blogger-sphere now for that kind of self-promotion purpose.

So what to do?

I don’t want to do one of those writing infomercial blogs either? Where, I talk about how to write a book and where to publish. Don’t get me wrong there are some really good ones (see Chazz writes), that are informative and helpful with downloadable e-books and all-sorts (I know because I’ve downloaded a few of them.) – Some, I can think of ten and I’ve looked at hundreds, are really good and have a very distinctive voice to them. Others – Are a shameless promotion tool for the wannabe authors upcoming book and just re-packages info available elsewhere.

However if you are looking for great advice then please do go and see Chazz, there is nothing I wanted to know about publishing that isn’t on his writers blog. David Gaughran, does a great one too.

So that’s out.

What about hot topics – could my Blog be the answer to all your current affairs needs but with quirk, humour and style? Ummm No, it can’t. I’ve written one post of this sort and it is the least liked or viewed and generally now sits in a corner crying to itself as it feels left out – It’s so not cool.

What About Cooking? Hmm, can anyone smell burning – I think I’ve left the water on again.

Funny, You can do funny right? – Well NO, You see I think I’m a comedic genius in the same league as Stephen Fry or Peter Sellers, but alas along with my muse, funny comes and goes…. That’s if it ever really showed up in the first place.

So what are we left with?

I don’t know.

I think I’d like to be a support system for people who are, like me – trying to write (whether a book, poetry, short or even a blog). I don’t want to preach to you about what way you should do these things because I think you can find your own way and as an unpublished nobody – who would care?.

Of course I am still going to talk about my writing – This Blog is a big part of that.

So I guess, I am saying…

Feel free to dip in and out or ignore me completely. I  like discussions and debate. I will put controversial titles up occasionally that I think you might be interested in and want to talk about? I guess that’s just it, I think my blog wants to be more about you than me. Because frankly, I’m really bloody nosy and love hearing from you.

So I’m off to re-write the ABOUT page. As always, feel free to comment.

SELF-PUBLISHING – ARE AUTHORS MURDERING IT?

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I am now metaphorically washing myself down after reading some of the threads on the Amazon forums about self-publishing. Those, who are thinking about self-pub, may want to look away now.

– First Post in a Forum Thread

“If we stop buying the self-published books maybe we can stop all the OTT plugging that goes on in discussions forums. Every time I open a discussion it’s filled with authors promoting their own books. Without being rude most of them are rubbish anyway, so if we get a campaign together to stop buying them maybe the self-publishers will get the message and leave us alone. Anybody interested in joining in?”

-Actual Forum Thread

“Is there a way to work out what is self-published so that I can avoid it?”

Phew, makes you think doesn’t it? These were just a couple of statements from the Forum in the UK and the most popular threads are not the ones talking about books but the ones talking about bad promotion and lack of quality in Self-Pub.

I was so shocked by the level of vitriol expressed by some readers  that I had to go and have a stiff drink. I even felt slightly ashamed of thinking about self-publishing my work when finally finished.

But is there any truth, to what some readers are saying?

I started this blog (twitter account) originally as a promotional tool for my future book. This was after some good old-fashioned research into the “ins and outs” of self-pub. It came highly recommended as a great marketing tool for gaining a readership and promoting your finished product.

I learnt really quickly that Blogging has this funny way of making you take a good long hard look at yourself. I started reading other people’s extremely well put together blogs (on everything from knitting to photography) with their genuine and authentic style, and all thoughts of self-promotion quickly went completely out the window.

Will I, in the long-term, include a link to my books on the Amazon homepage? You betcha, but one little link to a page is all. Will I promote by engaging with others, of course; the efforts targeted in places where my readers might live such as Good Reads. Will I be saying buy my book now with a synopsis in every single thread – No way, I’ll be talking to others about topics that I find interesting and putting out (I hope) quality content and not shameless plugs.

In Market Research, we promote the idea that marketing unless done in a genuine way simply doesn’t work. “Word of Mouth” advertising  and a “Great Product” is the only way to get your books read. That is, if you are in it for the long-haul. The constant spamming by Authors of feeds such as Twitter with “LOOK AT MY BOOK” style posts really hacks me off as does the “FOLLOW, INANE QUOTES FOR AN ADDITIONAL 500 FOLLOWERS”. Why on earth would I want those 500 followers who are stupid enough to do this? Will they care, “What I have to say?” more importantly if they are that thick, will I be interested in “What they have to say?”

Promotion is fine and I am all for it – Just do it in a way that is engaging and creative. We are writers, are we not? Create quality content, discuss and let your free excerpt or chapter do the talking for you.

The traditional success routes are now dead. Everyone has a blog, twitter account and a Facebook page and the bad self-pub are bashing the hell out of them. I know that not all self-pub is the same but reader disappointment with shoddy workmanship could help the big six keep their strangle-hold on content.

Now there are some excellent examples of Indie Authors. I have just finished a free self-pub book that I loved! I will be reviewing on Amazon and hope that this helps this woman find her market. It will only get a four star because of a couple of typos and formatting errors.

Exceptions do not make rules and as such 90% of the work that I have come into contact with as a READER is poor. I have  on my kindle, no less than 50 novels which I’ve downloaded in the Self-Pub category. Some were free, others were 79 pence (99 cents) or £1.99 that I failed to finish (and I hate not finishing a book).  My immersion in most cases, destroyed by a train wreck of prose.

As a writer and a wannabe author, I am currently saving every month so that I can have my work professionally proofed and edited. I will also do a considerable amount of research and re-writes. I get really angry when I see an Author who says, “My readers will tell me, if there are any mistakes.”

”I’m sorry; I must have misread, are you expecting your customer to tell you that you have a defective product?”

Sheesh!

So that’s my rant over, I would welcome an open and honest discussion about the challenges faced in this area by both new writers and as importantly, readers?

GOOD ADVICE FOR LEMMINGS

i'M THE ONE AT THE FRONT....

“I am glad that I paid so little attention to good advice; had I abided by it, I might have been saved from some of my most valuable mistakes.”

Edna St. Vincent Millay

“I owe my success to having listened respectfully to the very best advice, and then going away and doing the exact opposite.”

G.K Chesterton

As a wannabe writer, blogger and general dreamer; I thought I may need some advice on how to become self-published. How do I stop Amazon taking 70% as I am from the UK (,please don’t make me talk to you about tax; I’ll do anything). How do I format my work once it’s finished?

There are a thousand articles telling you to do things one way and then a thousand more telling you why it’s a bad idea.

Some will tell you that you need to blog and utilize social media. Others will tell you it’s possible to get someone else to do all this for you, and I’ll tell you that whatever you do the work has to be “good” in the first place or all the marketing plans in the world aren’t going to work.

Some will say you that you need a professional editor and graphic designer. Some will tell you it’s possible to do this stuff yourself. Some will tell you to take creative writing courses or go to writers groups. Others will tell you these are a waste of time and effort.

Some people will tell you that you have to give your work away for free until you prove yourself otherwise you will never sell anything, others will tell you that this devalues your work and makes you look amateurish.

And that’s just it. Does anyone know the right way to do any of these things? If you just want a nice little hobby –, then you don’t need a graphic designer, and you can most likely get beta readers to edit and in all likelihood can give it all away for free without a second thought.

If, however, like me, your dream is making money from writing. There, I said it MONEY - the dirty word when you talk about anything creative. I’m not expecting to be the next “Shades” author (funny, how everyone knows about the books but most can’t remember her name) so not millions and squillions. Just enough to get by, earn a living and pay the mortgage.

For this – you are going to have to charge a fair price for what you do. You cannot give it away for free. Now I’m not talking about an excerpt or a sample or an example chapter. I’m talking about those who tell you; it must be Free and/or you have to price at 99c (or 79p in the UK).  Because they had to, to get any sales.

Why do you have too? So that you’re in the mix with their work, at the same price and competing?

Authors have been successful at both price points in self publishing - at 99p and £3.99. I guess it depends on how hard you want to work. I’m passionate about pricing on books, and I believe if I devote six months to a year of writing; make sure it gets professionally edited, proofed and formatted, then I can charge a price that reflects this.

I am not saying all the advice is bad or useless, its not. Just be careful and pick what works for you. Good advice comes from your gut (you know that when you hear it, it will either make you angry or it will just seem right somehow) because some of the greatest authors ever, all have one thing in common. So take some advice made famous by Frank!

And now, the end is here
And so I face the final curtain
My friend, I’ll say it clear
I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain
I’ve lived a life that’s full
 I traveled each and ev’ry highway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way

Regrets, I’ve had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption
I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew
But through it all, when there was doubt
I ate it up and spit it out
I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried
I’ve had my fill, my share of losing
And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing
To think I did all that
And may I say, not in a shy way,
“Oh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way”

For what is a man, what has he got?
 If not himself, then he has naught
To say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels
The record shows I took the blows and did it my way!

Yes, it was my way

Songwriters: JACQUES REVAUX, CLAUDE FRANCOIS, GILLES THIBAUT, PAUL ANKA

You my not agree with any of the above or you may think by god she’s got it! Let me know… Comments, as always, welcome.

THREE THINGS I HAVE WRITTEN THAT CHANGED MY LIFE

1. A short story.

2. A love letter.

3. An apology.

1. A short story.

Most daughters believe that their relationship with their fathers is special and I am no exception to this rule. Knowledge, stability, laughter and tears have all come from the man, I measure all others too – My Dad.

Though he was absent for a great deal of time during my childhood with the forces overseas (as a Royal Navy Diver) – he had a profound effect on me, complex and amazing; he reads trashy thrillers, the classics and unfortunately Jeffrey Archer – let’s not hold that against him. He does Tai-Chi. He likes wild flowers and geology. He transferred to me his curiosity and knows stuff about everything in that God-like way that dad’s do. He also gave me a nuclear grade sarcasm gene.

I woz ere.

The Island off the coast of southern England where I grew up was surrounded by shipwrecks. Dads’ passion for being underwater extended past his job and when home he was often out leading a dive enthusiast group.

For anyone who has dived you will already know that the Holy Grail is finding the Ships Bell as these are one of the first items that get recovered on any discovery of a new wreck. Sitting on Priory Bay waiting for the little diving party to return from the “Wheat sheaf”, I was lucky enough to witness my dad emerging from the water triumphant.  Made even more unusual because the wreck had been regularly dived for over seventy years.

I wrote a short story about this dive and how the ship ended up a wreck in the first place – looking back I think the theme was about moments of time and physical objects waiting for discovery by the right person. I gave it to my Dad in a self-conscious thirteen year old way.

“S.J, I was there when the boat got wrecked, I stood on the prow. This is excellent.”

Now, all (good) fathers are encouraging and supportive but I mentioned the nuclear grade sarcasm, right? I have never received anything but constructive feedback from my Dad; I can always do better, try harder and learn more. It is also the only time except for when my grandparents died I have ever seen him cry.

This validated that there is something in my writing that can move people and every time, my bitch of an inner critic goes off. I think about this short and the impact it had and as a complete narcissist – the way it made me feel to move someone I love.

2. A Love letter

I know I love you

When I was dating my husband there was a lot of stuff going on; it was an extremely complicated time. We came to a point as some relationships do; where it was either “Give it All” or “Give it Up”. Convinced that I was worthless and undeserving of being loved, I put him through hell. Every time he tried to love me and support me, I would rail against it. Alone is better, alone is safe and secure.

But, I took a risk and wrote him a letter explaining why I loved him. He still has it and he also cried. Now, I don’t want you thinking that I get a sick pleasure from making people miserable but I’ve always thought that tears are more honest than words, when it comes to emotions. You can’t switch them on and off. They show not tell.

3. An Apology

I penned a letter that apologized for all the messed up and stupid things I had done during the time when I wasn’t quite myself. This lasted from eighteen to my late twenties. I put my family through pain and fear. There are no excuses that can take away the sheer wilful stupidity of some of the things that I did.

Let’s call them the dark years.

I spent a night sleeping in a graveyard with all of my earthly possessions in bin liners – that can probably show you better than I can tell you.

It was important to me that I said “Sorry” and meant it. That letter started my family’s (and my) healing process and a week after I sent it via post (it was a proper letter). – I got a call from my Mum,

“We are just glad we got our S.J back.” – And there was some crying. (Again…)

So, Reader – those are the three things I have written that have changed my life.

Is there anything you have ever written or said that with that most glorious of all educating tools “hindsight” has been pivotal for you?

Go on, share, I dare you!